Fall and spring are, without contest, my two favorite seasons. One lulls you into quiet contemplation and the other into a vibrant rebirth. Both offer a cornucopia of colors and smells. Today, as I wandered about my yard, I kicked about through the thick bed of fallen leaves. The ground was ablaze with golds and yellows and browns and reds. And there, standing alone in that sea of color was a tiny viola, the echo of spring.
The seasons in nature often mirror the seasons in our lives. There are ebbs and flows, and often a whisper of the past peeks up to remind us of where we’ve been. As I walked about the yard, I couldn’t help but think about the number of years spent tending those garden beds and the memories that were planted and rooted there; the plants each daughter chose to be her special plant; the flower selections for this child or that; the joy in seeing the first sprouts of a vegetable plant emerge. And, the laughter, so much laughter was planted, took root, and has grown in our yard.
Seasons change, but the echoes of those sweet memories linger.
I asked my younger daughter for a Christmas list this morning. I’ve already tucked away a few goodies for both girls and have a good idea of what I want to do for my husband, but I know the time for shopping will be in the panic zone before I know it. Still, I don’t want to miss this month. Though not exclusive, this is the month customarily designated for gratitude. For me, it is also a month of reflection; a time to look back before the busyness of the holiday season ushers in the closing of the books on another year.
On occasion, I pull out my old journals and read through the pages. Who was I two years, five years, ten years ago? What did I worry about? What were my struggles, dreams, and triumphs? What changes have I made? Have I made progress?
I started this blog (originally named Transitioning Mom) back in 2011. I wanted to use it to both record and reflect on my life as I moved through the transitional phase toward the empty nest. My days were so different back then. I was still actively homeschooling my girls. Life was filled with their needs far more than my own. That, in many ways, is what we do as moms, intentional or not. We lose sight of our own needs and before we know it, another year has passed.
Tonight I looked back on where I was and who I was the year I started this blog. Delightfully, I was taken to post that walked me back to the early days of this blog and my children’s lives. It was a walk down memory lane of Christmas ornaments and construction paper gratitude chains. And, for that, I am grateful.